Writing isn’t always Easy

Some things are tough to admit. Really tough. It’s even tougher, though, to not sound like you’re summoning a beacon of light upon yourself once the admission leaves your lips. Unfortunately, I do feel the need to explain myself. All the time. No matter what, I need people to understand. I over explain and apologize and I can’t help it.

I’m hoping to make a change and with that, I am only going to say this once. I have depression.

I hate that word but I lost my mother a year and a half ago and certain things and times of year are triggering (I loathe that word more). But it’s true. I do not want you looking at me and that’s all you see. I want you to see me. It just sucks that at this moment, this emotion is a part of me and I feel like I’d be lying if I didn’t address it.

I hope that one day I can look back on this entry and smile at how far I’ve come.

That’s all I want to say on the matter. I don’t have to explain myself to you and from here on out, I am done apologizing for what I write on this site. I want you to see me.